Background
In this discourse, Guru Sanju guides her student into the painful truth behind her anxiety, brain fog, and nervous system collapse. She reveals that the deepest wound is not only trauma, but the suppressed suffering of living in a dry, emotionally unavailable relationship.
The transformation offered is from silent suffering to courageous expression. Guru Sanju teaches that the student must stop keeping conversations inside her head and begin speaking directly to her husband.
She shows that healing cannot happen fully while the soul remains trapped in a relationship where it feels unseen, unloved, and treated like an object.
This teaching matters because it gives the student a real turning point. She must face the messy truth, write possibilities, ask her soul what it wants, and begin choosing life again.
The Brain Is Being Tested
Today, I am first testing how your brain and nervous system are functioning. I am checking whether you are able to recall things better than before and whether your mind is still thinking too much.
This is not a casual question. I am checking how sharp you are and how your cognitive function is acting today.
Your brain has gone through years of stress, trauma, and suppression. So every activity I give you now is also for your brain healing.
The Gratitude Question
Take pen and paper. I will ask you questions, and you will write the question first, then answer it.
The first question is: tell me three things about your life for which you are grateful. Close your eyes first, feel, reflect, and then write the answer.
This is not only writing. This is a way to make your brain look at life from another direction.
The Pain Comes Up
As soon as you go inside, the pain comes up. That is not wrong. That is the release.
You are unhappy, and that is true. Your mind is not making you happy about your existence, and everything about your life feels like it is going down.
So cry. Cry out loud. If you want to lie down and cry, lie down and cry. Do not suppress it anymore.
The Cause of Suffering
You have finally come to a conclusion. The cause of your suffering is remaining in this relationship.
You feel like an object in the same house. You do not feel like a human being.
He treats you like a dead person, and that has become the problem. Your soul is telling you to get out of this relationship, but you have not been listening to your soul.
You Are Not Alone
If you really want to get separated, then there is a possibility that separation can happen. But you have to follow a process.
You are not alone in this journey if you are with me. If you need me continuously, you can remain in the project and work with me through this transition.
I am powerful, and I know I can take care of you. Slowly, your brain and nervous system will start working when you take the decision to choose yourself.
Your Children Have Grown
You stayed for your children, and you did what you had to do for them. But now your children have grown up and have their own lives.
They do not need you physically in the same way. Now the question is: what about your life?
You can live your life. You can be alone. You can become self-sufficient and give yourself the love that has been abandoned in your own home.
The Missing Conversation
You must ask yourself whether you talk to your husband in the present. What kind of conversations do you have with him?
When was the last time there was physical intimacy, hugging, warmth, or real connection? If there is no intimacy and no conversation, then the relationship has to be seen as it is.
The conversation is happening only in your head. It has to happen from you to that person.
Speak to Him Directly
If you have not spoken to him about your intention of not living with him, then speak to him. Express what you feel about this relationship.
Ask for a solution from him and listen to what he says. Do not assume everything in your mind.
Even if he responds badly, talk to him. Your soul cannot live in this suppressed way anymore.
Write All Possibilities
Write down all possibilities. The first possibility is that you speak to him directly about what you are going through.
The second possibility is that you stop giving attention to him and start focusing completely on your own life.
You must become clear. Whatever is going on in your mind, write it in your notebook. Do not keep it trapped inside the head.
Ask Your Soul
Go deep inside and ask your soul what she wants. Ask whether she wants to be free in this house or somewhere else.
If she wants to be free in this house, something can be done. If she wants to be free somewhere else, then also something can be done.
But you must become absolutely clear. Do not come to the surface too quickly. Keep asking deeply until something becomes clear.
Accept the Present Situation
You cannot go back into the past and change this marriage. This is the destiny you have lived with: a husband who is dry and emotionally unavailable.
Now the real question is whether you want to stay alive or die inside this situation. If you want to stay alive, you must focus on your life.
Take one or two days to reflect. Write whatever comes up and allow the truth to become visible.
No More Suppression
No more good-good surface behavior will work. You need to face this in a raw and honest way.
If it becomes messy, go through the mess. If a fight happens, let the fight happen, but do not suppress what must be spoken.
When you express it to the person directly, a certain energy will release from your system. That energy has to be released with that person, not only inside your mind.
The Core Teaching
The core teaching is that healing cannot happen while the soul remains suppressed. Your anxiety, brain fog, and suffering are deeply connected to a relationship where you feel unseen, untouched, unheard, and unloved.
You must stop keeping the conversation inside your head. Write possibilities, ask your soul, speak directly, and face the messy truth.
If you want to live, you must choose your life. The relationship may continue differently, or it may end, but suppression cannot continue.
