Today’s discourse will give you an experiential understanding of Kundalini turbulence and the ego war.
Let’s start from the energetic experience that I am having now: the wind is blowing at the fastest speed. Thunderstorm and rain are about to shower. This is energetic. This is the energetic turbulence that I am experiencing now—in the form of strong wind blowing. Rain may happen any time. And this discourse will take its own turn based on the energy that is happening here, based on the energetic transformation that can happen—sudden, dynamic, totally new.
You cannot deny this energetic reality. This is the absolute reality. It is not based on your wish—the wish of the ego—that the rain should not happen, the thunderstorm should not strike, the lightning should not happen, the wind should not blow.
The ego is at war with this energetic reality. Despite knowing that strong winds are going to blow, that rain may happen—it is already happening—some drops are coming… but I am ignoring it. Why?
Because I myself am the cosmic electricity.
And this total electricity—the total energy field that you experience—is also me.
Now, this couldn’t be understood by your limited ego. The ego that is created from knowledge. You have the knowledge of energy; I have the experience of energy.
You deny the energetic reality of nature, of the universe, of everything. You understand everything from the mind, from the information that you know. Your ego is constructed from all the garbage collection of experience and the knowledge of others.
Buddha once experienced enlightenment over two thousand years ago—and you are stuck in the knowledge of how he experienced enlightenment. You don’t trust the energetic transformation that happens.
Look at this experience that I’m having now. This is energetic. I cannot deny this wind. I cannot deny the fact that it is going to rain. But your ego, which is made from knowledge, will deny this.
Your ego wants things to happen your way. Your ego denies the experiential and energetic transformation that you experience through my powers.
When I give energy transmission to my students—who are highly surrendered, who trust the Guru—they get the experience of freedom from their personality, from their role, from their ego, from their mind. Because it is actually the burning of the Phoenix into ashes, to become the new you.
But those whose crown chakra is activated, those whose Kundalini has reached the crown chakra, they have the highest ego. Why the highest ego? Because they have invested so many years collecting information about spirituality—never to have an experience of the real spirit.
They deny feeling over thoughts. They live in their mind for years. And when they get energetic transformative experience from the Guru, they don’t want to surrender—because all their investment in the ego, in the knowledge they have built over years—feels like a dud investment. And they don’t want to get out of that.
They want that dud investment to be alive—by still sticking to it.
If you know that you have invested in a dud investment, and you know you will no longer be getting any returns from it—you should withdraw your money. You should withdraw your attention and time from that dud investment.
But what do you do?
You take it personally. You take it to the ego—the person who has invested in that. A smart person will not remain invested in such a thing.
The energetic reality is flow.
And the ego—the collection of all information, all garbage—is stagnant. It is stored. It is no less than matter. All the matter that you collect in the name of the matrix, in the name of materialistic possessions—you invest the same way in the ego, in the collection of knowledge.
If you understand how this occupies your energy field in terms of data, then ego is like the knowledge that you gain in the name of collecting information about spirituality, about the enlightenment of other people, about the Kundalini experiences of others.
You are collecting lots and lots of information and making it into solid matter that keeps consuming the data of your brain. It requires a lot of energy to keep it as memory.
The memory faculty of your brain is filled with all this garbage that you have collected—over decades—by investing in spiritual knowledge. You are a passive, good-for-nothing person who is wasting your life.
Kundalini is here and now. Kundalini is life. Kundalini is the life force. It is prana. It is cosmic electricity flowing in you.
She gives you experiential shifts in energy—by making you experience the life force that you are.
But you deny this life. You never get immersive enough to feel life.
You have to feel with your five senses, engaging your brain with highest intensity in the present moment—to feel life.
And if you cannot do this, then you are a loser.
You are the unlucky and unhappy creature who is good for nothing on this planet Earth. Neither are you going to be free in this birth—or ever—if you don’t realize this stubbornness of the ego to not accept the grand reality of energy.
The grand reality of energy is this: it is energetic. It is electricity.
How can you deny electricity?
When the electricity goes away from your room or your home—you are in darkness.
If you deny Kundalini—which is the cosmic electricity—you will be in darkness. You are living in a dead body, and you are dead.
Physical death never happens—it is the energetic death that happens due to the union of Kundalini with Shiva—with consciousness.
Kundalini is She—the divine feminine energy in you, in the form of life force, in the form of cosmic electricity. But she is incomplete.
That’s why you are in the Matrix.
She is burning your karmas, so that the pathway can be made clear for her to meet divine consciousness, the masculine force of the universe.
And when Kundalini unites energetically with the cosmic consciousness, you become integrated as a person, as an individual—and the personality dissolves.
There is no involvement of ego in this entire journey.
This is the point of enlightenment from an energetic perspective.
Enlightenment is never intellectual. It is always energetic.
And those who have experienced energetic enlightenment—when they reach that state—they have expressed from that reality that you now know as “the knowledge.” And it was again interpreted by different people, in different ways, over ages.
Many people have interpreted the enlightenment of someone as written in different scriptures—and you are collecting all this garbage and making it your own.
What is the difference between you and the ones who truly awaken?
Where is your power of discrimination? Where is your intelligence?
You are not using it.
You keep on collecting what Buddha has said, what Krishna has said, what Jesus has said, what Rama has said, what Vivekananda has said, what Osho has said…
What will you do with all this collection of information, which helps in no way to make you free?
And when you collect all this information—without discrimination, without filtration—you suffer from brain-related diseases, because you have used all the power and energy of the body to store garbage.
Everything is energetic.
It is waste that you are keeping in your system.
You suffer from all brain-related and mental health related issues—schizophrenia, psychosis, bipolar disorder, multiple sclerosis, Alzheimer’s, dementia, arthritis, Parkinson’s disease, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome… constipation.
Years of constipation—this is constipation! Your garbage collection is constipation.
The moment you release your garbage from your system—by surrendering, by just not using it—everything will vanish.
Kundalini’s work is to dissolve everything.
When you just surrender and let it go, Kundalini actually and energetically burns everything—and transforms you into a new being.
But you are not letting Kundalini work.
You are not letting the Guru work on you.
The condition that you are in now—to transform you into a totally new being—it takes 18 months of huge effort on the part of the Gurus, on my part, who holds Shiva and Shakti powers to transform you.
It is like 18 years of journey, you are doing in 18 months.
And also—it is your responsibility to work on yourself.
If you are not working on yourself, nobody has the time to work on you.
If you want to get rid of the ego, you have to stop collecting it first.
You have to stop collecting information all the time. You’re collecting information like a garbage collector who goes to different homes, collects all the garbage, and dumps it in the dumping yard.
You’re collecting all the garbage, all the information out there in the world—and dumping it into your brain, dumping it into your system.
And all of this creates a lot of toxicity in the body. A lot of apana in your system.
You become overloaded with toxicity—not able to breathe well.
Look at yourself—how are you breathing?
If you want to test whether you are collecting garbage or actually in the journey of energetic flow, see if your chest breathing is on.
You cannot breathe from your belly.
You cannot do belly breathing.
If you really want to transform yourself, you have to work in all energetic dimensions of transformation.
And the first thing to get rid of this energetic turbulence and ego war is to relax and surrender.
You are in constant fight with Kundalini.
Let me tell you—all your lower energies, all your disturbing energies that you have collected from all the past lives are in the form of darker and denser energies—negative energies within you—which reside in the lower three chakras.
The energy of fear is stuck in your root chakra. You are an insecure fellow. You don’t trust life. You fear going into the unknown. You have trust issues. You have issues with a judgmental mind.
You carry lower energies in the form of jealousy. You feel jealous of people who are prosperous. You’re jealous of abundance.
All the lower energies have their contrasting positive energies, which reside in the upper chakras—starting from the heart chakra and above. These hold the energies of courage, strength, gratitude, truth, and love.
But you—you blame others. You never take responsibility. Everyone who is going through this mental psychosis or brain-related issues—look at yourself. You are jealous, cunning, your mind is not pure.
You are not a simple person. You are not in the flow of life. You look at everything with doubt, with confusion. You never trust anything that is true.
You blame. You feel guilty most of the time. You carry shame. You keep burning with anger. You’re frustrated most of the time. You’re restless. You have anxiety—and all of this leads to depression.
You have extreme pride—a different kind of pride—the pride of being a loser. You have the impostor syndrome, where you feel you are not good enough. You are always burning with envy, hatred.
All these lower energies are located in your lower body, in the lower three chakras, where your digestive system, intestine system, and everything else is located.
And because of these energies, you suffer—from extreme chronic constipation, irritable bowel syndrome. For years, you’ve not cleared your bowel well.
You have insomnia issues, because when your bowel is not cleared, your sympathetic breathing is on. It is not in rest and digest mode.
So you don’t get sleep either.
And when you are not getting proper sleep, you’re always in fight, flight, or freeze mode.
Your sympathetic nervous system is hyperactivated, leading to lack of sleep.
And lack of sleep is directly related to all the brain and mental health issues.
If you are on your Kundalini awakening journey, your spiritual awakening journey, and you are having all these issues, then you are 100% filled with these lower, denser, stronger energies.
Your heart chakra is totally blocked.
Most of the time, you are unsuccessful in your relationships. You are unsuccessful in your career. You are unsuccessful in maintaining your health.
You are all the time constipated and farting—not only with gases—you’re farting with your words.
When you talk, you stink.
You don’t know how to talk to the Guru. You don’t know how to respect the Guru. You don’t have gratitude toward the Guru who is transforming you.
You stink.
You don’t know how to surrender, how to open your heart to the divine intelligence, to the divine love.
And when you are radiating with all these lower energies, you find everyone as a competitor. You are in continuous comparison of your existence—with the Guru, with other people who are prosperous and successful in life due to their hard effort.
You feel that destiny is very favorable to the prosperous people—and you are just the victim.
You feel yourself as the victim, on whom life and the universal forces have inflicted suffering.
You over-exaggerate your problems—just to steal the attention of the Guru.
You are not honest. You are not loyal to yourself. You are not trustworthy—not even to your own soul.
Nobody can rely on you.
You fail in relationships because you are not trustworthy. You tell too many lies. You are a cheater.
I have so many cases coming to me—people with Kundalini awakening combined with bipolar disorder. And they are cheaters in relationships. They cheat their boyfriends, their husbands, the people who trust them.
That is why they are lonely.
You suffer from loneliness—not because of Kundalini.
Kundalini never makes anyone lonely.
It is your ego that makes you lonely.
Kundalini is such a beautiful and powerful force. She opens the universe of love energy—when you acknowledge her presence in you.
At least, this is the truth for me.
I don’t know about you.
If you cannot feel that—then you are a loser, an unlucky person who cannot feel the love energy of Kundalini flowing in you.
Your heart chakra is blocked for a reason—because of your cunningness, your cheating nature, and your negativity.
Contrary to these lower energies, which keep on fighting with Kundalini, Kundalini is a powerful force. She creates turbulence in you by punishing all these lower energies—which are like demons, devils, and ghosts.
The past is the ghost.
These energies have come into you, and you are feeding them—by collecting all the garbage in the form of knowledge. The investment you make in this knowledge is garbage.
And when Kundalini makes you realize all this, you fight with Kundalini and resist the flow of energy—the life force.
Kundalini’s purpose is to rise higher. So she will kill these ego constructs anyway. And when you radiate in the higher chakras—with the energy of abundance, the energy of courage, the energy of appreciation, the energy of feeling at peace, feeling loved—then your throat chakra will open.
You will start speaking the truth. No more lies.
If you are still lying, your throat chakra is blocked.
If you are with Kundalini, the turbulence of Kundalini will stop—just the way it has stopped now.
But if you are against Kundalini, it will create havoc in your life. You will suffer the highest. You will be in pain, and you will not be free in this birth—ever.
And even if you have become enlightened, and you are not acknowledging this power, then Kundalini will descend and settle back into the root chakra again.
This has happened to many people out there who are on the spiritual path.
When Kundalini awakened in them… when Kundalini reached the Sahasrara… when the union of consciousness and Kundalini happened—the moment of enlightenment happened—they became greedy. Greedy to use this power for wrong reasons.
Some of them invested all their money in gambling. Some of them invested all their money in alcohol—fulfilling the desires of the ego that they had never been able to fulfill when they were a human being.
And Kundalini tests everyone at that moment.
Kundalini tests everyone—whether this person is ready and eligible to go higher.
When you are on the Mount Everest peak—that is the point of enlightenment. Whatever you call it—Nirvana, Enlightenment, Samadhi, Liberation—it doesn’t matter.
At that point, you realize:
You are not the ego.
You are not the body.
You are not the mind.
You are not the memories.
You are not the five elements.
You are not anything.
You are pure energy, pure consciousness, which is the witnessing presence, awareness, and the electric current, the electricity of this entire universe.
After that realization, it becomes your choice—whether you go upward or not.
When you are at the peak of Mount Everest, there are only two paths:
Either you come down, be humble, respect your journey, and live your life with gratitude, knowing:
“Yes, I reached Mount Everest. But I cannot stay at the peak all the time. I have to be humble enough to leave—and not make this a one-time event of my life.”
Some of the most adventurous trekkers, when they reach the peak of Mount Everest, know: there’s no higher peak than this. So they return to live humbly.
Or at most, they explore other mountains as recreation—but they don’t identify themselves with only climbing up.
But the ego? The ego thinks:
“Now that I’ve reached the Everest peak—I can go to space. I can go to the moon. I can go to the external universe.”
Is this practical?
Is this possible?
No.
You may go in a spaceship. You may go on a rocket. You may go on a mission—but it is pointless. It is meaningless.
So Kundalini tests you at this level.
And she creates new challenges for you—even when you are enlightened.
You are tested by Kundalini in multiple ways before she gives you powers.
She will first test your stamina. She will test whether you are physically healthy or not.
Because your brain and nervous system are not ready for the heavy downloads of cosmic electricity.
So she will test you—for months, years.
If the Guru is with you, the Guru can make it all happen in 18 months.
But if the Guru is not there, it may take decades—because the ego’s resistance continues.
That’s why post-enlightenment sadhana is required.
Those who have not done post-enlightenment sadhana with the Guru—they are in darkness.
They have come back to their original lower energetic state, where they operate from lack, from negative energies.
They are more poisonous than before.
Even a normal human being is better than these people—with spiritual ego—who feel they are enlightened.
They are not of this world.
They are not of the universe.
They are just poisonous creatures—wasting their lives, spoiling the lives of others—appearing as teachers.
They are philanthropists teaching others how to live life, when they themselves don’t move their own ass.
How can they teach people how to live?
The Guru is a Master. The Guru is like a Zen Master who transforms.
Let me tell you—nobody has ever become Buddha by following Buddha.
Buddha did not become Buddha by following Buddha.
Do you understand the meaning of this sentence?
Buddha never followed anyone to become enlightened.
So by following anyone, you will never become enlightened.
If you work with me, my ways are practical, energetic, realistic.
You remain… a crow. These lower energies are like crows. And Kundalini is the eagle—who takes the flight into the universe.
But these crows—they don’t want Kundalini to be spreading in your energy channels. They don’t want the electricity to move through your system—because it will burn all the egoic blockages, all the toxicity in your system.
The turbulence is going to happen.
And you yourself—you cannot ever be free. I can give you this in writing.
I get so many stupid cases—of people in their 70s, 80s, 90s. They come and say:
“We became enlightened 50 years ago… we were meditating one day, and we got enlightened.”
And from that day till now, they are still enlightened—but they are bedridden.
Because there is no real work. There is no energetic reality.
In their mind, they are enlightened. Their ego thinks it. Their intellectual understanding says it.
But is it energetic?
An energetic Siddha like me—with superpowers, with the highest power of clairvoyant reading, and so many other powers… the power of transforming you, the power of energetic movement of Kundalini—
I can move Kundalini in you. I have that power.
And Kundalini responds to me only.
I can make you free—provided you are surrendered.
Live life in the most simple way—that is the “Chop wood, carry water” concept.
What does “Chop wood, carry water” mean?
Before enlightenment: Chop wood, carry water.
After enlightenment: Chop wood, carry water.
But the perspective changes.
The perspective changes to: “I am not the doer of this act. I am the flow of this act.”
I flow through my mind-body, through my brain, through my nervous system—making use of all the senses, making use of this instrument—to flow.
And that is why things happen.
This happens after enlightenment.
Before enlightenment—you think you are doing it.
So all the suffering, all the pain—belongs to the ego.
You have to deconstruct everything.
All the investments that you have made in constructing your ego—need to be divested.
You have to withdraw all your garbage—or throw it, or burn it.
And only then—you will be free.
My first requirement for students who join me in the Phoenix Project is this:
You have to unlearn everything.
And those who have done that—are Phoenix now.
I’ve been doing this for 10+ years, and they are living happily, powerfully, freely—away from the Matrix.
A powerful life.
Another aspect of this ego war—which creates the turbulence in Kundalini—is the desire for power.
If you want enlightenment, if you want to be free in order to have powers, then let me guarantee you:
You will neither be enlightened, nor will you ever receive any powers.
Kundalini is not here to fulfill the desires of the ego.
You have many more births to go through—where you will settle your karmic accounts, your prarabdha, your liabilities, your unfulfilled past actions.
Maybe in some birth, you’ll become free. Maybe you’ll receive grace or blessings from the universe.
But before that, you are not going to be free.
Not in this birth.
So don’t want to become free just to have powers.
And the last—and the most horrible—aspect of the ego that is creating blockages in your freedom, that is creating this turbulence is:
The desire of the ego to move Kundalini.
The most stupid and idiotic knowledge you have collected—thinking you can move Kundalini.
I give you techniques. I teach you. I transform you through energetic transmission of Kundalini energy—removing your blockages, your ego, your negative energies—by working on your past lives, working on all the demons in you.
Because I am that powerful.
It is my work.
But some of you—who are stupid—you do your own thing. You think you are moving Kundalini.
You get panic attacks by doing such stupid techniques that you’ve learned from god knows where.
You start doing things on your own:
“I’ll move Kundalini out of the crown chakra…”
And it creates blockages. It goes up—then falls down again.
Are you that powerful?
To move Kundalini?
I just laugh for hours at your stupidity. And I leave.
Who can work on a backbencher, who doesn’t listen to the Guru?
You’re a backbencher if you’re trying your own techniques, when the Guru is there.
When I say—don’t do anything. Just focus on your breath. Just be present. I give you simple techniques to be present with your energy and consciousness.
But you don’t like it. Because the ego is dying.
And all these techniques—lead to the death of the ego.
And you don’t want that.
So you resist the process. And you start doing your own thing—the most horrible thing.
And then you get panic attacks.
And then you call the Guru:
“Save me from this panic attack!”
Ha ha.
You don’t trust the Guru.
So how can the Guru save you?
The Guru is like Krishna. The Guru is like the universal forces—who laugh at the stupidity of the ego. The limited you who thinks you can move Kundalini.
The Guru has not become a Guru in just one life.
Millions of lives, millions of years of sadhana have made the Guru—have brought those powers—for a bigger purpose.
Your purpose is not even filled with healing. It’s not filled with any compassion, any grace, or any intent to reduce the suffering of others.
You don’t even want to reduce the pain and suffering of yourself.
You cannot expand your heart.
You cannot expand and love.
You’re such an unlucky person that you cannot love anyone unconditionally.
So, you will die.
Your ego will die its own death—not an issue, not a problem.
Kundalini will find her way.
She will awaken, she will become enlightened, she will be free—in those who are here for bigger and deeper transformation of themselves first, and then others.
Those who want to reduce the suffering and pain of others—who are also suffering.
There’s no hurry.
But those of you who are in the crown chakra—my only advice to you is this:
If you want to be free in this birth, ever…
And you want this Guru Sanju to work on you…
Then you have to work on yourself first—with deep levels of purification.
Purify your garbage.
Come without your knowledge. Come without your blockages.
If you don’t use something, you lose it.
So stop using your egoic knowledge, and you will lose it.
A time will come when you will forget everything. You won’t even remember what you studied in school or college—because you haven’t used it.
The same way—for the last 20, 30, 40 years—you’ve collected so much spiritual information. But you’re not using it.
So stop using it.
Use your experience.
If you want to feel what Kundalini is, you can feel it right now.
Close your eyes.
Focus on your third eye.
Internally.
Take a few breaths.
Suddenly, you’ll feel some energy movement in your body.
And for more experience—about what Kundalini is, how she can transform you, how she can relieve you from all your problems—on physical, mental, and energetic levels…
Then you have to be one with the flow.
You have to go downstream with the river that is Kundalini.
You cannot go upstream.
If you are going against the flow of the river, against the current, then war is going to happen. And you are going to suffer.
The turbulence is going to happen. And you are going to suffer. That is fixed.
You are creating adharma. And Kundalini is for dharma.
She will kill you. She will punish you. She will make you into nobody. She will make sure that you die.
And if you don’t surrender now, a point in time will come—when you will be knocked down by Kundalini.
This has happened to most people who had huge intellectual blockages.
A point came—they were bedridden. For days, weeks, months.
And that knockdown is certain.
I know Kundalini. I know how she functions. I know everything—how and when she acts, how she transforms, how she purifies, how she cleanses you.
She will lead you to a condition where you can do nothing.
You will need a caretaker—a person to take care of your physical body.
You cannot eat on your own.
You cannot bathe.
You cannot perform your daily tasks.
You cannot even go to the toilet alone.
So many other things.
You’ll be bedridden.
If you are not understanding this now—you will understand it when you are punished for resisting and fighting with Kundalini.
That turbulence is for sure.
But…
If you realize—after reading this discourse—
“That it was my mistake, that I have wasted many years of my life… I don’t want to struggle anymore with the Divine Kundalini and this process…
Let me surrender. Let me receive…”
Then—you will be relieved.
Then—you will be free.
And if you are having—by any chance—any male ego of not surrendering to a Guru who is in a female form, then you will suffer more.
If you don’t know me, you will suffer more.
If you have come to test the Guru, then that too is another mistake.
If you feel you can test your knowledge against what the Guru knows—then let me tell you:
The Guru knows the truth.
I know the absolute reality.
And if you are coming with this intention, then let me tell you:
I have the reading power.
I can see through you.
I know what’s going on inside you.
I may not tell you, but I know it.
This—you must be careful about.
So those of you who approach the Guru—know this:
If you are a liar, the Guru will catch you.
So it’s better you don’t approach the Guru with lies, with manipulation, with ego.
The journey of millions of years has led to your suffering and pain—because of this ego.
Now—this is your last birth.
The last chance.
The last birth to get free.
But if you don’t get free, then many more lives are waiting.
Because until the time you become free, this energy is going to test you in multiple ways.
You cannot test Kundalini.
You cannot move Kundalini.
You—the ego—have no power.
The ego is created from illusion. It is created from the illusionary energy of Maya.
And you are in Maya—the energy of illusion.
You are illusioned by the forces of the universe.
There are only three energies that operate in this universe:
- The positive energy—Kundalini. The electrified, cosmic electricity.
- The neutral energy—Consciousness. The witnessing force. It does nothing—just witnesses.
- The negative energy—Maya. The illusion. The ego, the mind, the memory.
The negative energies are always fighting with the positive energy.
Because when positive energy prevails, negative energy is transmuted.
This is the law of energy:
Energy cannot be created, nor destroyed.
It can only be transformed from one form to another.
So either the negative energy remains, or the positive energy takes over.
When positive energy becomes powerful—your negative energies are transmuted into positive.
That is enlightenment.
Your ego, your mind, your memory—everything dissolves.
And that leads to your transformation into the Phoenix.
That is why the Phoenix Project is successful—for those who have allowed themselves to be worked upon.
Who have allowed themselves to burn—to burn their old self, to burn everything that is restricting them.
You have to allow things to happen.
You have to leave your masculine ego.
You have to leave your male ego.
You have to leave your intellectual ego.
You have to leave everything behind.
You have to come naked, nude, and say:
“Transform me.
I have left everything behind.
Free me from all pain and suffering.
I want that permanent bliss.”
And that is only possible—with the help of the Guru.
If this discourse does not transform you, if it does not make a shift in you, then…
You are actually unlucky.
And a loser.
Nobody can help you.
Take care.
Bye-bye.
As usual—have a great day.
Thank you.
